You've Come A Long Way, Baby?

Watching a webinar panel discussion today, it occurred to me I am not a mother. That seems like a flat statement. The more complex revelations were: I have never had to fight the stigma of being a working mom or fought an internal struggle of whether or not to go back to work or even decide what length maternity leave I should take.

Another revelation, rather a shocking horror, is how far we have NOT come. Forbes magazine reported in 2021 the gender pay gap is 82 cents on the dollar. I believe that is only an eight-cent increase since I was a girl in the 1970s.

Did you just get whiplash? Yeh. Me, too. This is on par with the lack of growth on minimum wage. My first job in 1987 paid $4.25/hour. Now in 2022—35 years later—the minimum wage is $7.25. It is how interesting minimum wage ensures pay equity. Or does it?

Women have been underpaid for what seems like all eternity. Again, perhaps another flat statement. But this one has zigzags. So why are we running a tortoise-style race on this issue?

The panelists suggested the cultural mores of our childhoods have played a large part in the slow propulsion. Subconsciously or not, many of us were brought up in a sexist culture. I for one was not allowed to mow the lawn. I really wanted to because the perfectionist in me was eager to create straight ribbons of green grass. My father didn’t even like the idea of me having a job at the age of 16.
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But that didn’t stop me. Somebody had to pay for the cassette tapes I wanted. And how amazing do you think it felt when I mowed the lawn at my rental house as an adult? Strange things to feel liberated about, but it was real for me. On both occasions I owned my power.

The first time I negotiated my salary as a candidate was deeply satisfying. I had researched salaries for this position in the geographical area as well as cost of living. I counter-offered fairly and both sides compromised.

As women, it can be a struggle to aim high, especially if we don’t know our worth or don’t believe in the value we bring to the table. Nobody else is going to toot our horn for us. We have GOT to start defining our own worth. I relocated on my dime but they agreed to a higher wage.

Working mothers ought to strip their minds of any guilt and shame for taking time to bond with their baby. Conversely, as women we tend to overextend ourselves to earn validation. “Oh, you’re Super Woman for juggling a career, being a soccer mom, volunteering for Habitat for Humanity, and making dinner.”

No. Listen up, men. This is the 21st century. Time to put your money where your mouth is and pay women what you pay the men. Smoking is no longer chic. Nor is underpaying women.