Radical Honesty: To Thine Own Self Be True?

When Shakespeare wrote those famous words for Polonius to speak, was it meant as a warning for himself against Polonius' own hypocrisy? We often hear people say they give great advice but never take their own advice. Or, was it a lesson for his son Laertes to learn in adulthood that if he remained true to himself, he would bear integrity in his actions?

In today’s world, I liken this to Radical Honesty, a phrase I recently learned. Though it was in the context of one’s personal life, it can be applied to all aspects of life. For this blog, it will focus on how it translates from personal to professional.

Let’s dissect the full line Polonius “spake” in The Tragedy of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark. “This above all: To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not be false to any man.”
At its core, the phrase encourages authenticity and self-awareness. It suggests understanding one’s own values, beliefs, and desires is paramount. However, the meaning isn’t simply about indulging every whim. Rather, it’s about honest self-assessment and aligning your actions with your genuine inner compass.

Many of us wear masks for many different reasons. The very nature of truth is subjective. But this means we are not being authentic. We may think we are when deep down, we are reserving something—holding something back. Perhaps we don’t want to offend someone or hurt their feelings. Why? This could be due to fear of someone abandoning us or thinking less of us. In the work setting, perhaps we do not trust others.

Let’s explore the why further. Could it be we do not trust ourselves? We do not trust our own emotions? We do not know ourselves? Had Hamlet known Radical Honesty, might Ophelia have been spared heartsickness?

Self-awareness is a key to emotional intelligence which is a key to Radical Honesty. Radical in this sense is not defined as an extreme departure from the norm, particularly from a political standpoint. Rather, it is a departure from the usual or traditional business practices. Leaders are expected to be buttoned up and have all the answers and solutions buttoned up as well. I argue Radical Honesty is essential—there must exist a deep, internal relationship—a commitment to nurturing your inner being and taking responsibility for your own actions. This trickle-down phenomenon is real and must begin with leaders.

HR is not excluded. In fact, the HR professional is often the glue between leaders and employees. Therefore, HR leaders must also be aware of their own authenticity. I am an emotional person and as an HR professional, my empathy runs deep, which doesn’t always lend well to objectivity. I must learn the balancing act between Radical Honesty and fairness. This is HR 101 and I know this. Putting this into practice, however, is difficult.

Shakespeare’s longlasting phrase is also used in the film Dead Poets Society to encourage students to find their true voice and stay true to their beliefs. As my HR career has progressed, I have learned to find my voice and *use* my voice. That may be the hardest part. But if we are not doing this, are we really being true to ourselves? And can we then be honest in dialogue with others?

Radical Honesty challenges me in being honest with myself and thereby with *my* boss. I have been told I am opinionated—I may have earned the title of being bossy. I like to think of it as getting things done. But am I forthright when it counts? Do I know how to ask for what I need as an employee—not as the HR professional, but as an employee?
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Radical Honesty is *our* truth. It is faith in ourselves and the courage to truly be known. Don’t abandon yourself—don’t agree with something if you don’t agree. Consider that honesty can be an omission as much as a lie. Give yourself the voice to be honest with integrity and good intention. Being honest with yourself means you understand who you are. Our bodies tell us when we are not authentic. And while claiming our honesty is not easy, self-curiosity is a tool you can use to dig deep to discover awareness.